Port Charles Chuckles

Daily Recap 5/30/08

I’m going to do an abbreviated Friday recap because it was a slow day show-wise and the garden needs weeding and it’s a lovely day outside and I totally hate General Hospital right now (maybe forever).

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Today’s recap is entitled Slow Burn after a 2005 movie with Ray Liotta and LL Cool J - it’s one of those twist-y, turn-y movies where you don’t know who’s playing who until the end. Great film it’s not, but I almost always enjoy Ray Liotta.

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Poor Spinelli is feeling the burn today in places he didn’t know could hurt. Jason informs him of the shift in power that’s taken place. Later, Sam says Spin must push past the pain to move toward his goal of wooing Maxie.

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Nikolas mistakes Claudia for Emily again (major burn for NEm fans there - not a favorable comparison). Nikolas opens up about how Emily helped him overcome his fear of loving and fixed everything - she took a piece of him with her when she died and now he wakes up feeling empty. Later, Alfred worries Claudia about Nik’s fragile emotional state, and the fact that he took the horse out in the dark. Claudia goes looking for him and finds Nikolas bruised on the ground having been thrown. (Still not hating them together, platonically, so far).

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Jax and Carly are arguing more - I can’t stand the hypocrisy here. Carly wants Jax to sever ties with Kate - she’s jealous, but when Jax suggests that Carly and Morgan would be safer away from Jason, Carly gets hysterical. When Kate stops by, Carly eviscerates her verbally, burning with anger and righteous indignation. (How the flip does Carly, that adulterous witch, have the unmitigated gall to give Jax a hard time?!? It boggles my mind.)    

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Alexis stops by to see Sonny. She’s heard from Diane that Sonny gave up the business and custody of the boys. Alexis requests that Sonny do the same for Kristina. Sonny refuses, explaining his rationale for Morgan. It’s an amazing slow burn as Alexis gradually comes to understand Sonny’s true motivation for his actions and realizes that this whole custody arrangement is just another power-play between he and Carly and has nothing to do with the actual safety of his kids. NLG was brilliant as she finally let Alexis unleash her anger at Sonny.

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Johnny doesn’t want to be an "accessory" for Maxie at her party - he declines her invitation and leaves Maxie burning with irritation and Lulu gloating. Later, Maxie sends Lulu to the Post Office and calls Johnny back to Crimson. When he gets there, she straddles him on the desk chair and kisses him. Spinelli’s eyes are burning with horror as he witnesses this incident.

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Ric advises Anthony to hit Jason again, while he’s still grieving over Michael. Trevor accuses Ric of an agenda, and cautions that "Unlike you Ricky, Mr. Morgan usually hits his target". Speaking of targets, Jason skips blithely into Castle Dracula and sets it ablaze with Anthony inside. Later, as Anthony watches his house burn helplessly, Jason steps from the shadows and the two engage in an intense stare-down.

Daily Recap 5/29/08

For those of you who like to remain spoiler-free, I am going to attempt to go on with my day as if this is a "normal", crap-fest of a Thursday on General Hospital and not the end of the world as we know it.

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Sidenote: Am I the only one who didn’t know that The New Kids on The Block are touring again?

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Anyway, back to GH - - Is it cheating to use the title of a 1973 documentary about urban transportation for my recap title?    

It’s not exactly (or at all) a movie, but I think it is an appropriate title for today’s episode and also for Josh Duhon/Logan fans: Where Do We Go From Here?

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The day starts with Maxie and Lulu arguing and belittling each other at the Crimson office. (I may have commented once or twice how I loathe this storyline). Spinelli stops by and Sam arrives shortly thereafter, blatantly attempting to make Spinelli look more manly with her praise of his prowess. This is completely lost on Maxie and Lulu, neither one realizing that Spinelli is attempting to cast aside his bumbling nerd routine, they’re too busy sniping at each other.

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Back at Castle Dracula, the question is: where do we go from here? Ric is advising Anthony to strike Jason now, while he’s vulnerable and before he can consolidate his power. Johnny advises keeping the truce, building a base of power in Port Charles and then striking later. Ric accuses Johnny of not wanting to piss Lulu off by going after her buddy Jason. Johnny in turn, accuses Ric of a personal agenda (regarding Elizabeth) where Jason is concerned. (Cripes Johnny, keep your mouth shut about the innocent around your father, he doesn’t need any more ideas bouncing around inside his evil little brain)

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Carly and Jax are asking where do we go from here? in terms of their marriage. Jax can’t pretend nothing’s wrong, and Carly hasn’t even admitted the worst of her indiscretions yet. Later, Jax and Kate have an argument about Carly and Sonny, but they decide to avoid the topic in the future and remain friends. Right about this time Carly busts in and demands that Jax choose Kate or her - he can’t have both. Clearly it’s totally fine for Carly to "have" whomever she wants, though.

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Milo, Max, Diane and Bernie () are all waiting in Sonny’s old office for Jason to arrive. The new man on the throne has many wanting to know where do we go from here? Jason asks for a moment alone (I seriously thought we were going to get a tantrum here, I was kind of looking forward to it - maybe some tears, a stone-cold-hissy) but alas he composes himself and gets down to business.

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Sidenote : the Sonny-imposed Diane/Max dating embargo has been lifted, fornicate away!    

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At General Hospital, Elizabeth fields a complaint from a patient claiming his ED medication is no longer perking him up. This, combined with the previous medication incidents, gets Lucky’s spidey-senses tingling. Where do we go from here? I don’t know, but I’m kinda hoping a member of the PCPD might actually be involved in solving a crime this time around (call me delusional).

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Sam takes Spinelli back to her place - she is going to whip him into fine physical shape. The idea is just so bad, as is Kelly Monaco’s outfit, but I found Bradford winning in the scenes (over-the-top growling aside), so I might be amused. It’s really like leading a lamb to slaughter though, giving him this false hope where Maxie is concerned. Anyway, Lucky stops by (someone finally remembered LuSam - two days in a row) and the look on Lucky’s face when he sees Spinelli with the dumbbells is under-stately hysterical.

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Maxie and Lulu are still taunting each other. I hate this storyline (did I already mention that?) But it was pretty funny today when Lulu asked about Maxie’s obsession with the men in her life - Lucky, Logan, Spinelli...Lulu wondered if Luke would be next and Maxie said "it would be worth it just so you could call me step-mom" LOL Maxie tells Lulu that Johnny is next and proceeds to call him to the office. Where do we go from here? Well, Maxie and Johnny will be going to Frederico’s fancy party together and Lulu doesn’t look pleased about it.

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Carly barges in to Jason’s office and he tells her they must sever ties. The whole point of this new arrangement is to keep her and the boys safe, they can’t do that if she’s always hanging around him. Things need to change all around. Carly argues, she needs Jason and he needs her. I need a double-shot of anything.

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Ric and Trevor are still waiting for Anthony to answer the question where do we go from here? when Vaughn calls to say that one of Jason Morgan’s ships just blew up. It appears Anthony already had the ship targeted, he was just amusing himself with their arguing on the point. (Bruce Weitz did this adorable little "happy-dance" in his wheelchair as Anthony was outlining his dastardly plan to destroy Jason, that just tickled me no end - I continue to enjoy Daddy Z). Trevor advises caution, Jason is a different animal than Sonny, he should be treated with more care.

Previews:

Alexis wants Sonny to relinquish custody of Kristina

Jax and Carly discuss their future (again)

Castle Dracula

burns (it looks like Daddy Z is inside, but we’ll see tomorrow)

Daily Recap 5/28/08

I was still on my high from the fabulousness that was yesterday as I began to watch today’s episode. I sobered up good and quick.

Today was an interesting episode. There were lots of different set-ups, many characters interacting with several different people throughout the course of the show. It was different...and...interesting. I do enjoy variety, but when it came time to write my recap, I found myself longing to watch an Oprah rerun featuring Dancing with the Stars past winners and sixth season cast instead, so I’m guessing overall I wasn’t that enthused about today’s show.

I’m going to use a 1992 film called Lapse of Memory for today’s recap.

We start with Spinelli waking up in Maxie’s boudoir, in bed beside a scantily clad Maxie. From the look on The Jackal’s face, I’m thinking he had the same thought I did (Whoa, now they’re doing the fantasy sequences in color, here comes the Sam Spade voice-over.) Alas, it was no dream, but Spinelli can’t remember what it was in fact, due to a lapse of memory. I guess Sonny clocked him pretty hard - I was kind of hoping he’d wake up talking normal(er) - no such luck.

At Castle Dracula, Anthony is worrying about Claudia - he wants to know where she is. Johnny relates that she called to say she’s fine, but wouldn’t say where she was. Anthony is apoplectic at this uncertainty. He’s worried she’s off doing evil somewhere plotting against him. He’s also annoyed because Johnny keeps defending Claudia. Anthony really does have a loose grip on sanity, if at all here, he wants to be the sole occupant of John-boy’s heart. Trevor works Anthony into a frenzy about Claudia, Johnny storms off saying he refuses to watch Trevor feed Anthony’s paranoia (I don’t think it’s ever been hungry sweetie). Is Trevor having a lapse of memory regarding what happened last time he got Daddy Z all riled up? I predict disaster.

Jax returns from Rome (yipee - love the scruff he’s sporting!). He and Carly argue, Jax gets some great lines about how shabbily she’s treated him throughout this whole ordeal. Jax "doesn’t want to be an outsider in our marriage" he doesn’t "want to be your after-thought" he feels like "a concerned neighbor baking a casserole" instead of her husband. All great points, bravo Jax! Then, Carly whines about Rome and Brenda - (clearly she’s having a lapse of memory regarding the icky limo-sex with Sonny). Jax confesses he didn’t see Brenda (drat) in Rome, instead he turned around and came home to work on things with Carly.

Mac bursts in to Maxie’s bedroom and finds Spinelli in her bed - Priceless! Hysterical! John J York has the best facial expressions ever in the history of the world in this scene!!! I can’t even describe their wonderfulness, it has to be witnessed.    

Anthony reminds Ric that he expects him to "manage" Claudia by whatever means necessary. Anthony wants Ric to turn her against Johnny so Anthony can have Johnny’s only loyalty. Ric explains that he can’t work too fast or Claudia will get suspicious. Anthony replies "She was born suspicious, it was only later in life that she became ambitious, and envious and a raging bitch as well"  Yep, I gotta love Daddy Z (I think I’ll cut my own father some slack the next time he calls me a control-freak).    

Lucky and Sam are having coffee and muffins on the docks. Sam complains about needing to find a job now that Luke’s on the run - maybe she can pilot a ferry boat she suggests. Great idea, Cam will love that, Lucky says. But Elizabeth is still being picky about that whole "kidnaping-incident", so fingers crossed for a lapse of memory.

Mac goes to see Robin - yipee!! He admits to a lapse of memory regarding how badly he mangled Robin’s relationship with Stone, he’s afraid he’s handling Maxie just as poorly now. In addition to the sheer joy of seeing John J York multiple times today (he had the mid-show bumper also) it was hysterical when he told Robin "I found a mobster in Maxie’s bed" Robin looks appropriately concerned and asks "Who?" Mac replies "Spinelli" and Robin snorts, trying not to laugh uproariously in his face (I didn’t attempt to hide my glee - I laughed out loud). Mac asks her to please speak to Maxie regarding Spinelli.

Sonny (who is redefining smug these days) goes by the office to see Jason. More arguing about the business/custody of the kids etc. Sonny’s pissy that Jason appears to be taking Carly’s side over his. Jason suggests "let’s just stop for a minute and not make this about you or me or Carly". (OMFG - could we please? That goes for the entire show, not just this episode!!) Clearly, everyone is having a lapse of memory about what happens every time one or the other of them tries to "get out" of the mob, but never-the-less, eventually Jason convinces Sonny to sign away custody and the die is cast.

Sam runs into Spinelli on the docks - I’m sorry, I don’t know what they were talking about, his hair was really bothering me here and I couldn’t focus. I enjoy Spinelli, but sometimes the writers over-do him just a tad (read: a lot) and it’s hard not to cringe. Anyhow, Sam figures out that he’s had a lapse of memory regarding whether her slept with Maxie, so Sam goes to Maxie to find out the truth, then reports back to Spin - alas, no biblical "knowing" took place. Sam then volunteers to help him make-over himself into a specimen worthy of Maxie. Why do I feel like Sam is setting him up for major heart-break here?

Robin goes to see Maxie at Crimson - they discuss Maxie’s relationship with Spinelli, Georgie’s crush on The Jackal and generally have girl-bonding, it was very nice. Robin seems to encourage Maxie to look past Spinelli’s "off-beat" personality. Maxie insists that he is her best friend, she wouldn’t want to ruin that, even if she was attracted to him, which she is not.

The Spencer/Webber clan of Lucky, Liz, Jake and Cameron enjoy the afternoon on the docks watching the big ships come into harbor (for approximately 20 seconds). Jason watches from the shadows mourning the missed opportunity his accident-induced lapse of memory created.

Sonny informs Carly that he has given up both the business and Michael and Morgan. They both regret that it has come to this. Sonny wants Carly to promise that Morgan won’t lie awake wondering what he did wrong the way Sonny did after Mike left. Carly promises that Morgan will always have the memory of Sonny’s love.

The four horsemen of the apocalypse (Ric, Trevor, Anthony and Johnny) are discussing the Alcazar piers at Castle Dracula when Jason stops by to inform them all that he will be taking over Sonny’s business. From now on - they deal with him (cue scary music ).

Previews

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Sam will be buffing Spinelli up

Jax and Carly discuss their future

Maxie threatens to make a play for Johnny

The Z’s welcome Jason to power with a small explosion