Port Charles Chuckles

Insert Hallelujah Chorus Here

 

So, remember when Bob Guza used to be the head writer of General Hospital? 

 

{Insert long pause for cart-wheels and joyous squealing}

 

GOODNESS,  have I waited a long time to say those beautiful and melodic words, they are like a choir of angels singing.

 

So, remember when Bob Guza used to be the head writer of General Hospital and I was desperate for something positive to say so I created a dialogue of the day section to applaud particularly witty sections of the script and then ended up primarily using that section as a dumping ground for the stupidist thing Carly or Sonny said this week?

 

Well, those days are over.  No longer will I use "dialogue of the day" sarcastically, there is a new sheriff in town.  Exhibit A:

 

 

I realize that Robin and Carly have had similar arguments in the past, and Robin has even made similar (valid) points before.  However, something in the tone of Guza's writing always led me to believe that the viewers was supposed to think Robin was being unreasonable and bitchy rather than . . . well, accurate.

 

Maybe it was Patrick siding with Jax and telling Carly so?  Whatever it was, I read the tone of this particular scene much differently than those in the past and I was pleased with what I heard.  It was a good Friday in Port Charles.

 

And in conclusion, I love you Garin Wolf.

A Step in the Right Direction

 

When Garin Wolf was first pronounced the new head writer of General Hospital, I will admit that I had a less than demur reaction - -  

 

Then, he did a couple of interviews tossing around words like "balance",  and "multi-generational stories", and "identifiable emotion" and I began to have noticeable heart palpitations  

 

Finally, after endless weeks of waiting (and slogging through HORRENDOUS stories like Lulu's bordello adventure and Jax's drugging) Garin's first day finally arrived, and I have to say - - I was not disappointed.

 

Okay, I was a little disappointed because I was truly hoping that Tuesday's show would open with Edward tossing and turning in his bed as flashbacks of the past few years played in fuzzy-focus across the screen.  Suddenly, Edward would sit bolt upright, awakened by the realistic terror of his nightmare.  Rushing downstairs to the Quartermaine living room in his bathrobe and nightcap (you just know Edward wears a nightcap), he would find a very much alive Alan, AJ, and Emily sitting with Monica, Tracy, Dillon and Ned arguing over the last ELQ stock report or the latest protocol change that was being implemented at General Hospital while Alice and Reginald served breakfast. 

 

A bit too whimsical? 

 

Perhaps, but I would not have objected in the slightest if the new headwriter had elected to merely ignore the past five years or so and begin fresh. 

 

Alas, it appears that Mr. Wolf appreciates a challenge and intends to pick up where Guza left off.  It will no-doubt take a good deal of time and effort to change the Titanic's course, but if Tuesday's show is any indication I think he's on the right path.

 

Let's review - -

 

No Sonny or Carly  

 

Monica is back  

 

Robin and Patrick spent some long overdue (stalker-less) alone time  

 

Helena reminded Lulu (and viewers) about the long-standing Cassadine/Spencer feud

 

Lucky is back to being a police officer  

 

Molly and Alexis may have stumbled upon a mystery of sorts  

 

Nikolas is back

 

We have apparently decided to cut our losses on Siobhan   

 

Shirtless Johnny Z. is back  

 

 

There really is a long way left to go, but these are all positive signs for the future direction of the show. 

 

At this point, I couldn't possibly ask for anything more.

 

There is NO Question Here

 

Way back in 2009 when the powers that be decided to bring back the character of Steven Lars Webber I was excited for many reasons: 1.) A Webber?  Yay!!  2.) A doctor?  Double Yay!! and 3.) NOT a mobster?  Hip-Hip-Hooray! 

 

Then, I found out that those same powers had cast Scott Reeves in the role and I was really excited because: 

1.) We don't get to see the General Hospital locker room nearly enough 

 

2.) He's adorable with kids

 

3.) He looks cute in glasses

 

and 4.) Did I mention how much I like that locker room? 

 

Well needless to say, after I'd recovered from the initial shock of Guza & Co. making two seemingly non-stupid decisions in a row, I came to realize that the character was going to exist only to allow psycho-Lisa to run rampant through General Hospital tormenting Robin, and offer occasional counsel to sister Elizabeth.

 

But that was still okay with me because occasionally, he plays the guitar

 

And also, visits the locker room

 

But after Monday's show, I really feel that Steve should have his "Dr. Ruth of Port Charles" license revoked, and possibly his right to cross the street by himself as well, because holy hannah did he give Olivia the worst advice I have ever heard.

 

It speaks poorly of Olivia that this was a subject she even needed advice on in the first place, but let's ignore that problem for a moment.  When Olivia explained that she had seen the mediator leaving Sonny office shortly before that same mediator accused Jax of drug-use and attempted-assault and wondered if she should let the police in on this information, Steve's response was this - -

 

You know what? Sonny and Carly and Jax are very capable,

very motivated adults. They all have access to legal counsel.

They'll figure this out. You don't have to sit here and tear

yourself apart about it.

 

What the what?

 

"They'll figure it out?" ??????

 

Screw the custody battle for a moment, what about the police and the judge "figuring out" that Jax was framed? 

 

How could anyone seriously contemplate NOT coming forward, knowing that they have vital information that could prevent a wrongly-accused man from being charged with a crime that he did not commit?

 

Take my advice Olivia - - run for the hills.  I don't care whether you can wash your laundry on his abs or not, his advice is terrible and you are too stupid to live if you actually follow it.